When The Door Finally Opens
I recently had an issue with my car. Firstly, it was just one of the back doors that wouldn’t open. Not a huge issue but then the other back door broke.
This meant that my kids (2 of which are over six feet tall!) had to get into the car using the front passenger door and then climb through middle section and throw themselves into the back seat.
As you can imagine this was not much fun for them and I heard a lot of complaining and whinging. It was also of course highly embarrassing for my teenagers when we pulled up outside of school or a party.
Finally, last week I gave up my car for the day and got the doors fixed under warranty. Hallelujah!
When I arrived home that afternoon with the working car, there were cheers. It felt so damn good to just be able to open the back car door and sit down. Something that we would normally take for granted, felt so exciting. I joked to the kids that maybe we should do without other things in our life to grow our appreciation and gratitude.
This simple example reminded me of how the hard times, the unpleasant moments, the trips and struggles in life can add and even create so much gratitude when things turn around and go our way.
The crappy times can make the good times so much sweeter.
Now, I’m not saying that you should deliberately seek out pain or engage in the practice of self-sabotage. No way. But the good news (well, kind of good news) is that you don’t need to go out of your way to struggle and stumble, because it will happen naturally to most of us.
You will have times in your life when you experience obstacles; when things aren’t going your way. It’s how you view yourself during these times that makes the difference. It’s the attitude you choose that either gets you through them and onto better things or keeps you down and playing small.
You must remember that change is the only constant. And with change comes opportunity.
The tough times teach us how to:
Work around obstacles and manage setbacks
Find the strength to persevere
Reshape our expectations and reset them
Be flexible and grow our emotional elasticity
All of which are critical skills to long term success and satisfaction.
By contrast, if everything comes too easily to someone, they will expect it to always go that way. Then when something does go wrong (which it will) they will take it harder because they don’t know how to manage struggle. They haven’t had enough practice.
We all know that there have been many highly successful people who have failed before they have bloomed. Success often doesn’t come quickly or easily.
While developing his vacuum, Sir James Dyson went through 5,126 failed prototypes and his savings over 15 years. Number 5,127 worked. JK Rowling, the author of the beloved Harry Potter series, started writing when she was a single mum on welfare. Her first Harry Potter book rejected by over a dozen publishers. Walt Disney got fired from a local newspaper for not being creative enough.
For these people, how sweet must the success have felt when it finally came?
Sometimes when you’re challenged, it’s like you’re being asked, do you really want this? How much do you want it? Let’s find out!
For you, right now, maybe you’re having a hard time at work, maybe you haven’t been on a decent date for months, maybe financially you’re not in the place you want to be.
Maybe you’re feeling like you’re trying so hard, but the door just won’t open.
Keep persisting.
Stay focussed on what you can influence.
Maintain a positive mindset.
Be kind to yourself.
Work hard.
That door will open and when it does, it will be so delicious!
Champagne and Sunshine,
Midja x