We’re Going on a Bear Hunt
Last week I had dinner with a beautiful friend who I haven't seen for a long time. We went to university together and we recently reconnected at an event. At dinner, we had 20 years of our lives to catch up on. We spoke about motherhood, careers, marriage, divorce, death, illness, new relationships and everything in between. It was so fascinating to hear her story.
As I drove home from dinner that night and thought about both of our lives, one phrase came to mind,
‘THE ONLY WAY THROUGH IS THROUGH’.
Life is going to throw a whole lot of things at you and there are going to be many transitions in your life. It might be a new job, relationship breakdowns, a situation with a teenage child, illness, or financial issues. All of these situations can be tough to deal with and can cause you stress and anxiety. Sometimes we just want to wish these difficult times away. We want to get into bed, close our eyes and hope that when we wake up things are better but unfortunately, they’re not.
Let me share with you an extract from one of my favourite children’s books ‘We’re Going on a Bear Hunt’ by Michael Rosen and Helen Oxenbury (maybe you know it well):
"We're going on a bear hunt. We're going to catch a big one. What a beautiful day. We're not scared.
"Uh-oh, grass. Long, wavy grass. We can't go over it. We can't go under it. Oh, no. We've got to go through it. Squishy squashy, squishy squashy, squishy squashy.
“We're going on a bear hunt. We're going to catch a big one. What a beautiful day. We're not scared.
"Uh-oh, mud. Thick, oozy mud. We can't go over it. We can't go under it. Oh, no. We've got to go through it. Squelch squerch, Squelch squerch, Squelch squerch. "
In life, when we are faced with the long, wavy grass, or the thick, oozy mud, there is no way around it. We've actually got to go through it, otherwise, we never deal with the issue. We just get stuck.
There have been times in my life when I’ve felt stuck in the thick mud and lost in the long grass. The trick is to keep moving forward and to always remember that there is an end to the tough situation.
So, how do we do this?
Keep a vision of a better future in your mind. So, what's on the other side of the long grass, or on the other side of the thick mud? What does it look like? What does it feel like? What does it sound like? What's life going to be like when you get through this? Hold that vision front and foremost in your mind. It will motivate you to keep moving forward.
Don’t do it alone. Strengthen your connection or reconnect with people; friends and family, who can support you through it. Also disconnect with people that are unhelpful, bringing you down and making you feel worse. Find a mentor or coach to provide you with professional help who can help you see things differently and keep you accountable.
Be kind to yourself during this time. Give yourself some time to reflect. Pamper yourself. Be compassionate and don't judge yourself, because when you're trampling through that long grass and that mud, sometimes it gets dirty, there's tears and frustration, and sometimes there's anger, and that’s all ok. No harsh self-judgment.
Sometimes life is like going on a bear hunt. And you know what? You've just got to get through it.
Happy hunting!
Midja x