Securing the Tent Pegs of Your Life
This is my last Monday with Midja video I’ll be recording in this house. After 18 years, we are moving and it’s an emotional time for me and for the kids.
We bought this block of land on our honeymoon. I remember the two of us standing here deliriously happy and imagining the life we would build together here. It was to be our forever home but life had other ideas (as it so often does!)
A few years ago, when I got divorced, my wonderful dad bought this house and moved in with us. This is what family does, right? It was an absolutely magical time having dad here with the kids. He was my rock. Every time I go downstairs I can feel his presence and I often just sit there and think of him and feel so grateful and blessed to have had such an amazing dad and for my kids to have had the chance to be so close to him.
Throughout the last few years, as life has handed me a few curve balls and there has been a lot of change, this house has been the constant in my life. I know that it’s just a house, bricks and mortar but during times of stress and change, there is such comfort in having something familiar that you can hang onto. Throughout everything that life has thrown at me, waking up in the same bed, in the same room with the same view and heading downstairs to make a cuppa, just made everything seem ok. It gave me certainty in my uncertain world.
You see, I think that life is a lot like pitching a tent in a camping ground. To secure your tent, you need to have a certain number of tent pegs in the ground. To feel secure in life, you need to have some areas of permanency. You need to have something certain to hang onto to, whether that be your work, your partner, your family, your friendships, your health or even your home.
Without enough tent pegs properly in the ground, you’re vulnerable to your tent flying away with the next gust of wind or the rain coming in and you ending up wet, cold and miserable. Not much fun!
So, have you ever felt like your tent is about to fly away? That you don’t have enough tent pegs in place? Have you looked up to the sky and asked ‘what else have you got for me?’
Sometimes you can be coasting along in life for a long time and then BAM! Change comes all of a sudden in all aspects of your life. This can feel scary. Sure, it can be a time of exponential growth and development, some might even say excitement but in the moment, when we are in the middle of this change, most of us feel out of control and lost - not sure what to do next and what decisions to make. It feels as though a gust of wind could knock us over.
So, what can you do when you feel like this?
Firstly, just breathe and remind yourself that this is just one moment in your lifetime. Tide comes in and tide goes out. I re-watched the movie Bridesmaids on the weekend and was singing along during the end scene to the famous Wilson Phillips song Hold On - ‘Don’t you know things will change, things will go your way, if you hold on for one more day, things will go your way. Hold on for one more day.’ Embarrassingly corny I know but so true.
Secondly, think deeply about what tent pegs you already have in place. Ok, there may some areas of your life that need some work and attention; there may be some things you feel are missing at the moment; but what do you have to be grateful for right now? For me, I’ve been concentrating on my 3 amazing kids, my closest girlfriends, my sister and my physical and mental health - all safe and confident aspects of my life.
Thirdly, if there are some tent pegs missing that you want to secure down, then pick one and focus on that. Get that area fixed into the ground and then do the next. I don’t know about you but I’m not Wonder Woman! I can’t do everything for everyone all the time. At the moment, my focus is on building a new home for my family so that we can feel happy and safe and start building new memories. What’s your focus right now?
So, this time next week, I’ll be in the new home. The next chapter.
Fresh start, new beginnings……....
Midja x